So, once again, you have overspent in spite of your promises to yourself, your spouse and your children! You have probably also put on a few pounds although you were really determined not to eat as much as you did. You are beginning to think of tomorrow—the start of a brand new year and all the uncertainties it will certainly bring.
My advice to you is to let go of yesterday and all its pitfalls and begin to look forward to tomorrow with an attitude of gratitude and a realisation that you are still on this earth with your loved ones. That is something we should never overlook. Those of us who lost loved ones this year can really relate to the gift of another day, another year, and hopefully many more with our loved ones. While we are here, let us strive to live our best lives and to be our best selves.
We can begin the journey of self-renewal by reflecting on 2014. Today is probably a very good day to reflect on how much we accomplished—or not—last calendar year. I am pretty sure that we all have some regrets but let’s try not to spend too much time beating up ourselves, crying or feeling hopeless. Rather, let’s find the strength to assume a determined attitude and let’s pick ourselves up and face 2015 with hope, and a spirit of starting over with energy, motivation and self-determination.
We all have inner strength that we don’t even know we have—all we have to do is discover it by taking on a “can-do” attitude and by being determined to move on and do better as we strive to life our best lives:
• Let’s take better care of ourselves by exercising and eating healthily.
Remember to choose exercise methods that fit with your lifestyle. Choose whatever truly will work for you and if this is walking for 20 minutes three or four times a week, then do this. Exercise does not have to involve a great deal of money for cute outfits or gym fees although if going to the gym works for you, then do that. Make wise selections and along with exercise, eat small meals throughout the day instead of one large meal at night. Make wise choices.
• Let’s strive to be better parents, friends, neighbours and co-workers
We can all do better in this department because time has become such a scarce commodity and because too many of us have slipped into the habit of texting, tweeting, and e-mailing instead of calling, visiting or writing a note or sending a card (now we send electronic ones). Try not to spend too much time on self-pity—spend this time on goal-setting and making fixed plans to make improvements in the areas that we want to improve. Make incremental change and celebrate small triumphs along the way.
• Let’s make deliberate and consistent efforts to reach out to family members
Don’t wait until it’s too late, folks. Whatever you need to say, make the time and find the courage to say it—before that chance is taken away through sudden illness or death.
• Let’s develop habits that bring us joy and get rid of the ones that seek to destroy or hurt us.
Some habits like drinking too much or abusing our loved ones physically and emotionally may need you to seek some additional support, even professional help but if this is what is needed, do try to find the courage to make a start or a plan to get that help. I am seeing the destruction of many families because one individual just refuses to make a change. If alcohol abuse or any other “bad” habit is causing pain to you and your loved ones, this is a good time to reflect and take some form of action!
• Let’s de-clutter our environment—get rid of unwanted “stuff” and keep only what you need
This might sound like a habit that’s not important but you may be surprised to learn of how many homes are disrupted because the environment is not one that is conducive to a healthy or happy family life. Kids and grown-ups need and crave—and should have—an environment that is organised and enjoyable.
Additionally,
• Let’s strive to live a more organised and meaningful life
• Let’s clarify our goals and move forward, remembering that each journey begins with that first step
• Let’s celebrate small ‘wins’ along the way
• Let’s learn the power of forgiveness
Happy New Year!
Dr Starke is a psychotherapist/Life skills coach and OD (Organizational Development) consultant who provides workshops/seminars for employees and supervisors. E-mail thestarkereality@gmail.com or www.ctclifeskills.com.55