Mental disorders are very common. In fact, one in every four people has one of over 200 classified mental health issues, so, typically, there’s at least one person in an average household who may have a disorder.
That’s no reason to panic, to start self-diagnosing or labelling all behaviours around you, but it’s every reason to be considerate about the health of those in your environment.
It’s important to reiterate these facts because ample repetition may reach more people.
More people engaged could well mean more people offering care and compassion for those experiencing mental health challenges.
The pervasive ignorance of people we wish would be more sensitive to our cause, at times, riddles us with deeper affliction than what the illness presents.
Very often this unawareness exists because people are so engrossed in their own life struggles that it’s easier to overlook the challenged person rather than allocate time to assisting them in one way or the other.
Until we are faced with an actual situation or issue, most of us would go about our business with nary a care for those challenged by mental ill health.
A most difficult thing I’ve experienced is to be ill and to not be able to find one person who appears to care for your welfare during that time.
It’s even worse when the illness is that of a mind which automatically thinks the worst of every situation, and then to be placed in such periods of neglect.
Conversely, a person living with a mental disorder has difficulty in asking for help because that requires reaching out from a syndrome that continuously reaches in, turns inside, and sometimes even turns on itself.
And still, the stigma of being diagnosed or living with a mental disorder sometimes causes a person to shut down or shut out people who may be willing to help.
When a mental health patient is already battling inner frustrations and the attending demons, disappointments, crises, and the like, a lack of compassion and consideration from others are damaging occurrences.
So, it was refreshing recently to have a friend reach out and ask how she should approach another friend who had been reacting characteristically—shutting out everyone—having been diagnosed with a mental illness.
First, I said to her that some disorders are more severe than others, but none should feel like a life/ death sentence for patient or family.
That mental disorders cause mild to severe disturbances in thought and/ or behaviour, and can result in an inability to cope with simple everyday routines.
And, that disorders which are considered severe and are most common are (clinical) depression, anxiety disorders, schizophrenia, bipolar disorders, dementia, and panic.
“Symptoms of these disorders are either neurotic or psychotic symptoms. Neurotic covers those symptoms, which can be regarded as severe forms of normal emotional experiences (changes in mood, personality, personal habits and/or social withdrawal) such as depression, anxiety, or panic.
“Less common are psychotic symptoms, which interfere with a person’s perception of reality, and may include hallucinations such as seeing, hearing, smelling, or feeling things that no one else can” (www. mentalhealth.org.uk).
Most disorders are treatable and many patients have been known to experience full recovery with correct and timely intervention.
We, the diagnosed ones, understand that to have others treat on a regular basis with such peculiar issues can be “physically and emotionally trying, and can make (family and relatives) feel vulnerable to the opinions and judgments of others.”
So, inspired by my friend’s openness to learn, I now offer my top support measures for family/friends of the mentally ill to consider:
1. Educate yourself about the illness. “Educating yourself is really the foundation of support. Not knowing how the illness functions can create misconceptions” (psychcentral.com).
The mentally ill cannot just snap out of “it”, you’d know that if you educate yourself. So to say to someone with an “altered mental state” that you hope their illness could be “flagged less” betrays ignorance and a lack of compassion for how the person’s mind is engaged in the struggle.
Education facilitates friend’s/family’s acceptance that aggressive or weird behaviours are a manifestation of the illness, not willful, purposeful actions against them.
2. Stop behaving as if it cannot happen to you.
3. Treat your friend/relative with respect regardless of how symptomatic they appear or may become. This may require a selflessness that does not personalise every infraction.
4. Recognise and acknowledge your loved one’s courage. It takes courage to battle the devastating symptoms every day and to seek and stay in recovery. “In our society, we view people with a physical illness, such as cancer or diabetes, as courageous, but we don’t extend the same perspective to people with mental illness (psychcentral.com).
If you’re a friend or relative to someone who may have a mental disorder of any degree, it’s important to remember there is hope and help, and many resources on the Internet are available for learning and teaching.
(This column was first published in 2014 under the title: Practise being supportive of the mentally ill.)
CAROLINE C RAVELLO is a strategic communications and media practitioner with over 30 years of proficiency. She holds an MA in Mass Communications and is a candidate for the MSc in Public Health (MPH) from
The UWI. Write to: mindful.tt@ gmail.com